Wow. I have come to understand why it is that people prefer to be alone. Because you can never disappoint yourself, because you know yourself. You can always be disappointed by those around you because you learn to know them in a certain light, and before you know it, it turns out that they are someone completely different.
This situation usually comes about after instances of meeting people under the influence of alcohol/drugs/red bull. Where you believe that you're on some sort of so-called level and are so excited to meet someone who 'gets you'. Then you wake up sober and realise they are nothing more than a moderately well-educated buffoon with no more charisma than a hedgehog who was abused in infancy and has severe learning difficulties.
When you meet this sort of conundrum in your life, most people will go one of either two ways, to drink, or to enlightenment. As a life-long believer in that the world is a series of random occurrences, that your actions are not predetermined and that your soul mate is as much a mythical creature as Santa and the boogie man; it can only mean one thing. I must become an alcoholic.
Either that or I need to go home, to my friends who 'get me' and moreover 'get drunk with me'. I feel really homesick now, Manchester's not as cheap a night out and all the clubs are too far away from each other to have a decent night. And the taxi's are expensive. And I'm poor.
This poverty-stricken depression will end me. The end of the tunnel is near, but it's never near enough.
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