Well, just your standard evening in Mancunia. You leave the house for one sodding night and your house is broken in to. My lack of organisation in my past has generally plagued my life (see previous posts). Who the fuck would have thought that in my very time of need that my disgusting habits should see though some good fortune in a circumstance which hits those of us who are most unlucky.
I spent a month of my life living in ACTUAL poverty over this item which I am using to type up this blog post. £230 of my hard-earned cash (or 33hrs of my life) all for this little piece of electronic heaven. And to think that it had been stolen, (along with my other laptop which was infinitely better in every way except it was no where near as cute) wrought on to me the pain which only a parent could experience with the loss of a child. Probably.
But no, in the robbers haste they neglected to notice the little white box under my over-flowing washing basket which contained the one true object of my desires.
I'd like to think the moral of this story is that I should live like a squatter forever. Though it is really infeasible since I would like to be able to welcome other people into my space at some point, one day in my life.
On the downside they still stole a laptop worth £400 from my room. It also had Rome: Total War in it. And it shall be mourned appropriately and forever hold a special place in my heart, since this laptop doesn't even have a sodding optical drive.
But, when it comes to the standard view of assessing whether the glass is half full, or half empty. In my situation some cunt knocked a full pint out me hand, but the glass was dead nice so I nicked it anyway.
(It doesn't count as stealing when there's no victim!)
Yeah. Shit happens. Fuck you thieves! (Real ones)
Saturday 30 November 2013
Wednesday 27 November 2013
Come play with... Trying too hard.
It's funny how every relationship/encounter that I've ever had with someone of whom I had a significant instant attraction to always becomes awkward as fuck. It's weird, if you're yourself, just standard goofy little you, you always attract the attention of members of the opposite sex (I specifically say opposite as this does not apply to me personally with same-sex encounters), and when you click on that they might find you endearing then you start to go weird.
Why is it that regardless of who you are or who they are, you become lost for words, suddenly you watch what you say and become worried about what they may think! And before you know it you no longer have anything left to say at all and you're stuck trying to save what it was that you found attractive about them in the first place to find that it was lost somewhere amongst the lust and the butterflies.
It's a sad state of affairs when you become so consumed with lust that you place someone on a pedestal of whom has no place there, and you find yourself changing and HATE it. You're constantly bashing your head against a brick wall trying to remember who you were and to become that bright spark that lighten's their day, to find that you've become an overbearing nag desperate for attention.
What is it about the human brain which makes you instantly feel the need to change yourself once you have identified the current object of your desires? (note how I've used the word object, because they are no longer human, you can no longer identify with them on a personal level and you must now treat them with the utmost tenderness and care, like a Chanel bag.)
I haven't done this in a very long time (baring in mind that I've deliberately dated people that are not necessarily as 'physically' attractive as myself to prevent this) yet now I've decided that I actually would like to be physically attracted to my next lover, I know it's going to come at a cost because this is something embedded into my DNA since the dawn of time.
I shall be sure to do all I can to switch this off, although I know the only way that'll be possible is to never have a relationship. Which is probably best right now. It's just going to be weird since I've been solidly pretty much in long-term relationships since 2010, but I guess we've all got to start somewhere!
To being single! Woo! (Bored already) xx
Why is it that regardless of who you are or who they are, you become lost for words, suddenly you watch what you say and become worried about what they may think! And before you know it you no longer have anything left to say at all and you're stuck trying to save what it was that you found attractive about them in the first place to find that it was lost somewhere amongst the lust and the butterflies.
It's a sad state of affairs when you become so consumed with lust that you place someone on a pedestal of whom has no place there, and you find yourself changing and HATE it. You're constantly bashing your head against a brick wall trying to remember who you were and to become that bright spark that lighten's their day, to find that you've become an overbearing nag desperate for attention.
What is it about the human brain which makes you instantly feel the need to change yourself once you have identified the current object of your desires? (note how I've used the word object, because they are no longer human, you can no longer identify with them on a personal level and you must now treat them with the utmost tenderness and care, like a Chanel bag.)
I haven't done this in a very long time (baring in mind that I've deliberately dated people that are not necessarily as 'physically' attractive as myself to prevent this) yet now I've decided that I actually would like to be physically attracted to my next lover, I know it's going to come at a cost because this is something embedded into my DNA since the dawn of time.
I shall be sure to do all I can to switch this off, although I know the only way that'll be possible is to never have a relationship. Which is probably best right now. It's just going to be weird since I've been solidly pretty much in long-term relationships since 2010, but I guess we've all got to start somewhere!
To being single! Woo! (Bored already) xx
Tuesday 26 November 2013
Come Play with... Disappointment
Wow. I have come to understand why it is that people prefer to be alone. Because you can never disappoint yourself, because you know yourself. You can always be disappointed by those around you because you learn to know them in a certain light, and before you know it, it turns out that they are someone completely different.
This situation usually comes about after instances of meeting people under the influence of alcohol/drugs/red bull. Where you believe that you're on some sort of so-called level and are so excited to meet someone who 'gets you'. Then you wake up sober and realise they are nothing more than a moderately well-educated buffoon with no more charisma than a hedgehog who was abused in infancy and has severe learning difficulties.
When you meet this sort of conundrum in your life, most people will go one of either two ways, to drink, or to enlightenment. As a life-long believer in that the world is a series of random occurrences, that your actions are not predetermined and that your soul mate is as much a mythical creature as Santa and the boogie man; it can only mean one thing. I must become an alcoholic.
Either that or I need to go home, to my friends who 'get me' and moreover 'get drunk with me'. I feel really homesick now, Manchester's not as cheap a night out and all the clubs are too far away from each other to have a decent night. And the taxi's are expensive. And I'm poor.
This poverty-stricken depression will end me. The end of the tunnel is near, but it's never near enough.
This situation usually comes about after instances of meeting people under the influence of alcohol/drugs/red bull. Where you believe that you're on some sort of so-called level and are so excited to meet someone who 'gets you'. Then you wake up sober and realise they are nothing more than a moderately well-educated buffoon with no more charisma than a hedgehog who was abused in infancy and has severe learning difficulties.
When you meet this sort of conundrum in your life, most people will go one of either two ways, to drink, or to enlightenment. As a life-long believer in that the world is a series of random occurrences, that your actions are not predetermined and that your soul mate is as much a mythical creature as Santa and the boogie man; it can only mean one thing. I must become an alcoholic.
Either that or I need to go home, to my friends who 'get me' and moreover 'get drunk with me'. I feel really homesick now, Manchester's not as cheap a night out and all the clubs are too far away from each other to have a decent night. And the taxi's are expensive. And I'm poor.
This poverty-stricken depression will end me. The end of the tunnel is near, but it's never near enough.
Wednesday 20 November 2013
Come play with... A Cluttered Mind.
A cluttered room = a cluttered mind. Henceforth with Immediate effect I shall finally tidy this bitchin' mess which is my life.
In a blog post a few months back I addressed the fact that I had become a hoarder over the past few years and somehow managed to bring a lot of baggage from Newcastle down to Manchester with me, and transport it from various homes since I've been here.
Well as I have spent the past few weeks pondering my future and assessing my life, I have allowed my drastic change in lifestyle get on top of me and has genuinely sent me a little mad and I have managed to hoard a whole host of new shit (WHO NEEDS 4 CANS OF HAIRSPRAY?!).
My nan always used to tell me that she had no idea how the hell I could live in mess (I know, boring as fuq), and Chris used to spend hours sitting in my room amongst the clutter and just be amused by my lack of order in my personal space (wot a weirdo).
Now I see where they were coming from (berrr), I have been putting off addressing my own laziness by constantly being out jaunting on random missions to avoid the bane of my life. Tidying.
To say the past few weeks have been surreal would be a little bit of an over-statement. But it has definitely been an eye opener. I used to waste my life doing stupid shit like taking surveys online and spending many hours on YouTube watching moderately (not even) funny videos.
From there to spending as much time out of the house as possible, ensuring that I should only go home to sleep (if I really HAVE to) has really taken it out of me, and now I'm stuck in a position where I'm constantly over-analysing everything and my mind is about as calm as a cow when it's just clicked on that it's about to be slaughtered.
Therefore I shall finally tidy my fucking room and get some scented candles on the go, I'd have wine but I fear that it's just contributing to be problem (it's really not, I just don't have any in the house and it's fucking freezing outside) so I should give myself a few days grace before I decide to batter my liver once more with hot liquid goodness (mulled wine, you perverts!).
I've also just cut my hair in procrastination (EDGY AZ FUQ) and now have absolutely nothing left to distract me, aside from writing this blog post, which I should draw to a close on that note.
BAI! xx
In a blog post a few months back I addressed the fact that I had become a hoarder over the past few years and somehow managed to bring a lot of baggage from Newcastle down to Manchester with me, and transport it from various homes since I've been here.
Well as I have spent the past few weeks pondering my future and assessing my life, I have allowed my drastic change in lifestyle get on top of me and has genuinely sent me a little mad and I have managed to hoard a whole host of new shit (WHO NEEDS 4 CANS OF HAIRSPRAY?!).
My nan always used to tell me that she had no idea how the hell I could live in mess (I know, boring as fuq), and Chris used to spend hours sitting in my room amongst the clutter and just be amused by my lack of order in my personal space (wot a weirdo).
Now I see where they were coming from (berrr), I have been putting off addressing my own laziness by constantly being out jaunting on random missions to avoid the bane of my life. Tidying.
To say the past few weeks have been surreal would be a little bit of an over-statement. But it has definitely been an eye opener. I used to waste my life doing stupid shit like taking surveys online and spending many hours on YouTube watching moderately (not even) funny videos.
From there to spending as much time out of the house as possible, ensuring that I should only go home to sleep (if I really HAVE to) has really taken it out of me, and now I'm stuck in a position where I'm constantly over-analysing everything and my mind is about as calm as a cow when it's just clicked on that it's about to be slaughtered.
Therefore I shall finally tidy my fucking room and get some scented candles on the go, I'd have wine but I fear that it's just contributing to be problem (it's really not, I just don't have any in the house and it's fucking freezing outside) so I should give myself a few days grace before I decide to batter my liver once more with hot liquid goodness (mulled wine, you perverts!).
I've also just cut my hair in procrastination (EDGY AZ FUQ) and now have absolutely nothing left to distract me, aside from writing this blog post, which I should draw to a close on that note.
BAI! xx
Sunday 10 November 2013
Come Play... With New Beginnings
As one door closes, another opens, that's what they say so I am told. But lest we forget the moments of our past of incredible significance. For it is those moments who shape you into your new, improved, if slightly dishevelled self.
Looking back on the memories which made you feel intense happiness, do not mourn their loss, treasure the time you had, and make new beginnings with those feelings embedded in your soul. For no one can take them away from you.
You may not feel exactly the same next time around, but don't chase after it, for with each new individual, a whole new source of opportunity presents itself for you to explore. Treasure each moment, for you do not know when it will be your last.
Love is fleeting, lust even more so, so treasure it all the more, so when it's gone, who knows when it will next cross your path.
Lust gets you off, but it is Love which endures. It is a rare and beautiful thing. And I am so happy that I can say that I experienced it, in it's true form. It will live forever in my memories.
Thank you for your time.
Now, here's to the next chapter, I look forward to sharing it with you.
Looking back on the memories which made you feel intense happiness, do not mourn their loss, treasure the time you had, and make new beginnings with those feelings embedded in your soul. For no one can take them away from you.
You may not feel exactly the same next time around, but don't chase after it, for with each new individual, a whole new source of opportunity presents itself for you to explore. Treasure each moment, for you do not know when it will be your last.
Love is fleeting, lust even more so, so treasure it all the more, so when it's gone, who knows when it will next cross your path.
Lust gets you off, but it is Love which endures. It is a rare and beautiful thing. And I am so happy that I can say that I experienced it, in it's true form. It will live forever in my memories.
Thank you for your time.
Now, here's to the next chapter, I look forward to sharing it with you.
Wednesday 6 November 2013
Come Play... With Friendly Fires Remixes
Play this track, it is fairly old but just makes you feel incredibly euphoric and alive. If you don't like it, try it again, it will definitely grow on you. I have it on repeat.
One day we're gonna live in Paris
I promise
I'm on it
When I'm bringing in the money
I promise
I'm on it
I'm gonna take you out to club showcase
We're gonna live it up
I promise
Just hold on a little more
And every night we'll watch the stars
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
And every night, the city lights
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
One day we're gonna live in Paris
I promise
I'm on it
I'll find you that French boy,
You'll find me that French girl
I promise
I'm on it
So go and pack your bags
For the long haul
We're gonna lose ourselves
I promise
This time it's you and me for evermore
And every night we'll watch the stars
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
And every night, the city lights
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
And every night we'll watch the stars
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
And every night, the city lights
They'll be out for us
They'll be out for us
Come play with... The top 5 things to change when your life becomes shit.
In this post I would like to address the absolute bollocks that you may hear from your 'so-called' peers or even, 'betters'. Life is to be lived! To ensure that you do this to the full ensure that you follow the steps below to get yourself started...
Here are the Top 5 things to change when your life becomes shit.
1. In a relationship? End it. Bad patches are for the weak and needy, why waste your time on something which is not making you happy? Life is too short for mind games and stress, and if you live your life properly you'll be getting that enough from your colleagues/family/tax man. So ensure that you keep shit feelings to a minimum.
2. Your computer. Your computer no longer giving you goosebumps at it's sheer awesomeness? Sell it! If it's still relatively new you can sell it on-line for possibly up to 80% of it's purchase price! You will still need to pay roughly £90 for an iPhone 3GS... That shit was released 4 years ago!
3. Your diet. Constantly feeling lethargic? Eat a fucking banana you lazy bastard.
4. Drink more! A glass of wine a day keeps the doctors away according to a study which states that not only does wine make you an amazing person, and 25% more attractive which increases with every glass, but it also lowers your chance of heart disease! Whey!
5. Connect with people from work/college/uni/parental group/whatever. You'll find out that that annoying kid in the corner is actually amazing (ensure that you follow 4.) and that your colleagues are fabulous divas who you'll have beef on in the office if they are even half as much of a disgrace as you are!
There are many more things I could add. But that would eat into valuable work *cough* drinking *cough* time.
So I hope this helps!
Tra xx
Here are the Top 5 things to change when your life becomes shit.
1. In a relationship? End it. Bad patches are for the weak and needy, why waste your time on something which is not making you happy? Life is too short for mind games and stress, and if you live your life properly you'll be getting that enough from your colleagues/family/tax man. So ensure that you keep shit feelings to a minimum.
2. Your computer. Your computer no longer giving you goosebumps at it's sheer awesomeness? Sell it! If it's still relatively new you can sell it on-line for possibly up to 80% of it's purchase price! You will still need to pay roughly £90 for an iPhone 3GS... That shit was released 4 years ago!
3. Your diet. Constantly feeling lethargic? Eat a fucking banana you lazy bastard.
4. Drink more! A glass of wine a day keeps the doctors away according to a study which states that not only does wine make you an amazing person, and 25% more attractive which increases with every glass, but it also lowers your chance of heart disease! Whey!
5. Connect with people from work/college/uni/parental group/whatever. You'll find out that that annoying kid in the corner is actually amazing (ensure that you follow 4.) and that your colleagues are fabulous divas who you'll have beef on in the office if they are even half as much of a disgrace as you are!
There are many more things I could add. But that would eat into valuable work *cough* drinking *cough* time.
So I hope this helps!
Tra xx
Saturday 2 November 2013
Queen - I Want To Break Free
I want to break free
I want to break free
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self-satisfied I don't need you
I got to break free
God knows, God knows I want to break free
I've fallen in love
I've fallen in love for the first time
And this time I know it's for real
I've fallen in love, yeah
God knows, God knows I've fallen in love
It's strange but it's true (hey yea)
I can't get over the way you love me like you do
But I have to be sure
When I walk out that door
Oh how I want to be free baby
Oh how I want to be free
Oh how I want to break free
(INSTRUMENTAL INTERLUDE)
But life still goes on
I can't get used to living without, living without, living without you
by my side
I don't want to live alone, hey
God knows got to make it on my own
So baby can't you see
I've got to break free
I've got to break free
I want to break free, yeah
I want, I want, I want, I want to break free …
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